An Unexpected Hospital Visit...

I knew that I had a problem last night when my catheter started bleeding out every time I flushed it and that eventually I couldn't flush even flush it... this came after less than 48 hours of getting it put in, and this was my second one in a row that went bad after 2 days. These lines technically are suppose to last 7 days. Basically my veins and my body were done. After 4 weeks I don't blame them, but I'm still sick enough that I need to have the fluids and medications. So I called my doctor to find out what my options were, and the only option I was given was to have a PICC line put in. What is a PICC line you ask? At least I don't think many of you may know... I had no idea and I totally googled it and freaked myself out. The definition from the paper I was given at the hospital reads;

A peripherally inserted central catheter, often called a "PICC line", is a long, very thin, flexible tube that is usually placed into one of the large veins in

the arm, often just above or just below the elbow. This tube is threaded into a large vein above the right side of the heart.

I got pretty emotional and super overwhelmed when they didn't let Spencer come back to the x-ray room with me, but I was more emotional after it was over and I saw him waiting. I am a pretty big wuss and was scared in the first place, so to be completely alone, with super nice strangers of course, it was just all unfamiliar and scary. The thing that freaked me out the most was watching the x-ray machine and watching the tube be inserted into my arm and through my chest. It actually made me sick to my stomach and usually medical procedures don't bother me

so much.

My arm is super sore, so I'm hoping that will ease up in the next few days or by

tonight... either one. It basically feels like a migraine in my arm. Anything and everything kills when it has to do with my arm. Moving it, bumping it, you name it. My chest is super tight and feels a little uncomfortable, but I may just be imagining that, or it could just be anxiety. It's weird to think there's a tube inside my chest, right next to my heart, and I'm super freaked out that I am going to do something wrong when it comes to the medication and fluids... but hopefully that fear will ease after a few days and a lot of prayer. I'm so grateful that Spencer was able to be there with me, kind of, and that he has been so supportive. I know that my feelings of being overwhelmed and depressed about everything can be exhausting and tough for him, but he never falters. He's a good man. Hopefully I won't have to have the PICC line in very long, but whatever I need to do to have a healthy baby, I will do. This baby may have caused a lot of stress and worry thus far, but I would do anything for it. Even have a tube inside my body to make sure it's getting everything it needs to survive.

PS - St. Mark's Hospital has valet parking! Who knew???

Also, who knows how to get your hands on one of those big mugs from the hospital??? I really want one for water so that I can start drinking more and get off of these IV's. Need one of those big mugs ASAP.

It's Groundhog Day!!!

I am now into my 3rd day of being 26... heavy groan... no birthday post because I'm kind of over my birthday and I was sick so not the best day. I do have an amazing mother and sister who I spent lunch with and a fantastic husband who made sure I was comfortable. Don't you love how facebook replaces texts and texts replaces phone calls? I really don't. I got a ton of messages on facebook, a few texts (thank you) and no phone calls... I don't think I like that very much. And yes, I am guilty of just posting a quick post on facebook when I should've called. So to those of you who I have offended... I am sorry. Anyway, today is Groundhog Day so I will be spending the night in my bed with my awesome hubby watching this movie!

I love it and I watch it year round, but how can you even pass February 2nd without watching it? I also love Bill Murray! I
was bummed to read that little Mr. Punxsutawney Phil saw his shadow, because I think that's BS. We haven't even had a winter here in Utah (and I am NOT complaining about this! I have loved the lack of snow) so how can we expect 6 more weeks of that? So I did some research and discovered that our little friend Phil has only been accurate 39% ever! So then why do we celebrate this furry little dude every year?

I will admit, it is on my to do list to go to Punxsutawney, Pennsylvania someday and bask in the events surrounding Groundhog Day, but I really think that Phil does nothing except add to the lack of credibility of the weather man. How great would that be? To have a job where people turn on the TV to watch you but then actually expect you to be wrong? No fault. My kind of job! Anyway Happy Groundhog Day!!!!

PS - Groundhog Day is my official February holiday, due to the fact that I do not celebrate or recognize Valentine's Day as a holiday.... I bet there are enough people out there who feel the same way and we should start a club or something...

16 Weeks

Don't you just love the little glove thing on my hand protecting my IV? Super cool!!! So we hit 16 weeks and I'm still sick. Still at 2 bags of fluids a day and not eating much. I am able to try eating more, but the more I eat the more sick I feel. The toilet is still my best friend, but I have gained 2 pounds! Very excited about that. The Situation moves around like crazy. I didn't know what I was feeling at first and I was really nervous that something was wrong, but I googled it and asked one of my many nurses and visit me at home (VIP) and they said what I was feeling was the baby. I am building one stubborn child! Last night I tried to sleep on my left side, The Situation did not like that and would not stop doing cartwheels, so I switched to the right side and ended up with the same result. So I proceeded to my last option, my back. I have never enjoyed sleeping on my back but I never sleep at all, so however I can get comfy is going to have to work. Well the little fetus didn't like that either, so I just stayed awake and listened to my poor sick husband breath like Darth Vader. My belly is growing like crazy! I feel large, but that's normal I guess. Don't judge my picture... I know that I'm pale, but I think that since I started getting the fluids I look a whole lot better. Also I just don't really ever get out of my sweats or do my hair due to lack of energy and how nauseous it makes me so be thankful I got dressed for this picture. So thankful for an awesome Mom who keeps me company and tried to get me out of the house on the days that I am feeling somewhat decent, and for a sister who reminds me that this is normal. Also thankful for a husband who tells me when I try to put on makeup after not wearing any for 2 months that I look better without it, and for little brothers who always ask how the baby is doing... not me... but at least they care about my kid. They'll make great Uncles! Also I'm thankful for a Dad who asks almost everyday if I kept everything down, and still thankful for Jason and his Brad Paisley tickets... even though my head is still pounding!

Happy Birthday (Yesterday) Kim!!!

I had every intention of posting last night when we got home from Kim's birthday dinner, but I got incredibly sick and so that didn't happen. Luckily I have a forgiving family who understands that. They are pretty much awesome. Kim is definitely the best sister anyone could ever ask for! I mean she is my only sister so it's not a hard title to win, but still, it hasn't always been that way. For years growing up we did not get along or like each other. My poor parents. But finally when I went off to college, our relationship improved and strengthened. That's not to say that it is always perfect now, but I know that I value her opinion and her thoughts more than ever. I now enjoy spending time with her, and I am pretty sure I can consider her one of my best friends. She is a great Mom, a talented photographer, and a really great sister. We even get to be the same age for 2 days... How exciting is that? HAPPY BIRTHDAY KIM!!!!

Never Turn Down Brad Paisley... No Matter What!

For months I have been hinting to Spencer that I wanted to go to the Brad Paisley concert. I went to his concert a few years ago and loved it! I have been a huge Brad Paisley fan for years and he gives an AMAZING concert! I kept reminding Spencer that it would be the best birthday present and that it would make me so happy! I'm sure I was a tad bit annoying with all my nagging. Well, then I got sick and gave up on the quest knowing that it wouldn't be smart or healthy for me to go to a concert, plus Spencer is NOT a country music fan and he honestly had no interest in going. I did find out last week that he had looked up tickets without me knowing (crafty man), but he made a smart decision in not purchasing them due to the $120 price per ticket. I had come to the realization that I would just have to wait another couple of years and go when he came back to town, and despite my sadness over this thought, I accepted it.

4:30PM January 27th, 2012... I am riding on a bus full of cheerleaders to Cottonwood High School for a game. PS - I am the super cool coach who has an IV at the basketball games. Multiple students have asked if I was doing heroin through it... really? Anyway I get a phone call from my brother Jason, he asks what I was doing, and seemed very disappointed when I told

him where I was headed and that my plans for the night mainly consisted of watching high school basketball games and doing my fluids. Turns out he had acquired 4 tickets to Brad Paisley and needed someone to go with. He remembered how much I had talked about it during Sunday dinner so he thought he would ask me first. I got so excited that my catheter started bleeding, but I told him he would have to call Spencer and ask. As much as I wanted to go, I knew that Spencer did not, and I also knew I wasn't in any condition to go. Spencer surprised me and accepted Jason's offer and hooked him up with a date! So I anxiously sat through the JV basketball and as soon as the game was over I left with Spencer to head to the Maverick Center.

I forgot how much I hated concert traffic... I felt so bad for anyone who was just going that general direction and not to the concert because it was super frustrating to get anywhere near the venue. I didn't expect much from our tickets and I was just happy to be going at all. I think I was more happy that Spencer was willing to go because it's something that I really wanted. Free tickets don't hurt either. But our seats were AWESOME! They were directly to the left of the stage where you could see every detail. I could literally see his wedding ring on his finger when he would play on the stage in front of us, it was that close! I will admit I got emotionally a couple of times. The opening acts were Scotty McCreery from American Idol and The Band Perry, and I couldn't help but to get teary eyed when I thought about how this young 18 year old boys parents must have felt and how proud they must be of him. And then The Band Perry were all siblings and that gave me the same reaction. Thank you crazy hormones! The music was insanely loud and I had to eventually sit down because I was too nauseous and light headed, but the set was great! Brad Paisley played for 2 hours straight and played the best songs! Spencer even smiled once in a while and did tell me he had a good time.

I learned that I probably shouldn't do that again anytime soon. I still have a pounding headache, had to pull of my catheter because it blew (actually Spencer did it... thank you!!!), but I guess it was worth it. it was just as good as I had hoped it would be and it was the best surprise! Thank you so much Jason for thinking of us and thank you Spencer for being so selfless and helping me have an amazing night!

Bloody Catheter... graphic

From our seats.... No zooming

$3 for a cup of water... really???

Thank you crappy lighting at the Maverick Center for this awesome picture!

My AWESOME husband

Another Post from the Bed...

I am desperate to feel like myself again! Last night I had to once again pull out the catheter in my hand by myself because it blew and was causing me a lot of pain... Luckily Spencer was there this time to help me. So much better when someone is there to help you!!! But the down side is that I can't keep anything down and I haven't had fluids now for almost 24 hours... I am trying but just not having any luck at all. I didn't really think that the fluid was really doing much besides making me have to pee every 15 minutes and giving me energy, but now that I am without it, I can see that it was really doing a lot more than I thought. My goal is to feel better by next Tuesday because I would really like to feel good and happy while I'm turning 26.... Geez! I am getting so old! But I guess it's okay because the kids and teachers at the high school still think I'm in high school. The blessings of good genetics! Other news... totally popped overnight. I thought I was big before and now it's obvious that I'm pregnant... Sorry no pictures. Every

picture I have taken just doesn't look good.... so instead of a baby bump picture, here's me with my lovely bag of fluid chilling with my parents.

Really hoping that I start to feel better soon, so that I don't have to give up more of the things that I love doing! Super bummed that I can't go up to Sundance this year! That's one of my favorite things to do and Spencer has never gone before and I just thought it would be awesome to take him, but it's just not gonna happen. Sad. I will just have to save all of my celebrity stalking energy for next year. Sorry I haven't posted a lot... I definitely have the time, but trying to write positive things is a little difficult for me right now, so I would just rather not write at all. Hopefully I can regain an optimistic attitude soon and this sickness will pass. My heart truly goes out to any woman at all who has suffered hyperemesis, especially throughout their entire pregnancy. I am praying and hoping that after February 10th, I don't have to have the fluids anymore. There is a possibility that I have to have them until I have the baby, which is not ideal, but you gotta do what you gotta do in order to have a healthy child. And that's the goal here. Also, I am no longer a Kinville as of this morning. Finally had my Mom help me get to the DMV and got myself a Utah driver's license (ugh) with the last name Ahlstrom... It's official! Happy Monday!

Happy 3rd Birthday Cortney!!!

Love my niece! I can hardly believe that it has been 3 years already! Seriously it feels like she was born yesterday! I love that she is so sassy and that she can always make us laugh. I love that she pretends to be my baby and cry and talk and say that she wants to come out, and then she pretends to be me and say that the baby still needs to grow more first. A little creepy, but entertaining. I love that she is so excited for me to have the baby and talks about everything she is going to do with it when it is finally here. I can'

t help but to post the picture of her a few days after she was born flipping off the camera.... Cortney you are amazing and I love you and you can't even read, but Happy Birthday! I know you will be the best cousin to baby Ahlstrom!