The Mamma Bear In Me

Aniston has jaundice... this requires us to go to the hospital every day and have her little heel pricked to test her jaundice level. Well at yesterday's pricking, apparently the "nurse" who did it applied the wrong tape and it ended up twisting around itself and it ripped the flesh off her foot. The dude who was there helping us today totally acted as if it was no big deal, and maybe it's not the worst thing ever, but still... it's definitely not okay. I am so upset to say the least. Spencer is even worse... he has already planning on "connecting" with the hospital to let them know about the situation. My poor little girl....

Ten Truths of (my) Pregnancy

1. The little pink plus sign is only the beginning.

For most people that positive sign on the pregnancy test either brings overwhelming joy or intense fear. For me it wasn't either. It was more like, okay sure. I was just okay with it. We weren't trying to get pregnant, but we weren't against starting a family. It would have been nice to have a few years to get to know each other better and really get settled down in life and have money all saved up, but that wasn't the way it was suppose to be for us. We were supposed to get pregnant and bring little Aniston into our lives. Because I got pregnant we made significant changes in our lives. Changes that needed to occur and probably wouldn't have if I didn't get pregnant. Reading the positive sign on the pregnancy test is only the beginning of a whirlwind of changes and adventure. If you think that pregnancy isn't going to change your life, then you have got something coming, because nothing in your life will ever be the same!

2. Sometimes morning sickness lasts all 9 months.

I knew going into pregnancy what morning sickness entailed. I knew that there was throwing up, nausea, and headaches... what I didn't know or understand was that sometimes it doesn't go away. I had never even heard of hyperemesis before in my life! I didn't know that some people throw up constantly until the very end. I didn't know that it was even possible to lose weight while you were pregnant. I didn't even know what a PICC line was. My pregnancy allowed me to experience the extreme of morning sickness, but it also allowed me to learn so much. I learn that high school boys automatically think that an IV line is heroine and that heartburn is possibly the worst thing ever (besides labor, breastfeeding and the word "moist".) But really I think that it helped me to better sympathize and understand the experience of morning sickness. It was an awful pregnancy, and I don't think I ever tried to deny that, and it makes me sad because I never imagined that pregnancy could be that awful, but at the same time I think I was able to test my strength and to realize what I was really capable of, and that empowers me and makes me feel strong. But not strong enough to want to do it again for a very, very, very long time... if ever.

3. It's okay to ask for drugs.

I know that the fad right now is to have a natural birth, but that thought never even entered my mind. I always envisioned myself getting that epidural and making labor as painless as possible. (It's not possible to have a painless labor... anyone who says otherwise is a liar straight up). And I tell you what... that epidural was AMAZING! Kind of a weird sensation, but so worth the sharp prick and little pain that occurs while getting the drug. I was also drugged up a lot during pregnancy and I'm still drugged up. I will admit, taking your standard over the counter medications scared the heck out of me for pain while I was pregnant. Before hand it would take me 10 ibuprofen to even be effective, so for me to stop cold turkey when I got pregnant was a big deal. I was quite the druggie. o when the doctor started prescribing me medication during me pregnancy it made me nervous. I hated taking certain medications and feeling the reaction from the baby while in the womb. She would get super lethargic from certain medications and that really scared me. I needed that reassurance that she was alive and okay inside me. But everything turned out okay. Aniston is perfectly healthy and the medicine did help me... although my body did completely reject most medications and that was a bummer. Yesterday though I was still in so much pain that I went to the doctor and he hooked me up with 4 shots of lidocaine. It was super painful... like breastfeeding painful, but I felt amazing afterwards. I could actually walk. And this is super nasty, but I can write whatever I want, it's my blog.... I had the feared first bowel movement while still numb and it was awesome! It wasn't at all what I was expected, which was intense pain, and I couldn't be more thankful for those drugs! It's okay to be weak and ask for drugs. It's important to take care of your baby, but you also need to make sure that you are okay too.

4. Pushing isn't that bad...

Yes, it is hard work, but it isn't the worst thing ever and it always ends. I pushed for an hour and a half and it went by so fast! You just have to stay focused. For me, every time I pushed was one more time I wouldn't have to push again. The key to pushing is pulling back on your legs though... if you don't pull, then it's tough and slow. Yes, the last three pulls were hard and I felt like I had nothing left in me to exert the strength I needed to get the job done, but just remember what happens when you do push. A baby comes out! Your baby! It's also helpful to have an amazing nurse and husband who cheer you on and help pull your legs when you can't. The support made all the difference. I have experienced much worse pain then the pushing part of labor throughout my life. Just remember remain focus and keep your mind on the end result. The end result is so amazing... the stitches kind of hurt, but the baby part is pretty cool.

5. Recovery isn't easy.

I'm a little bugged by TV shows and movies where the lady who just has a baby is up walking around like normal and totally breezing through life. You still waddle after the birth... I have never experienced a UTI or any kind of disease down there, so I have never had pain like this. It hurts to sit down, it hurts to stand up, it hurts to cough, kills to sneeze and going to the bathroom is one of the worst experiences in the world. The first time I was able to actually get up and go to the bathroom by myself was AWESOME! I definitely woke Spencer up at 3am just to tell him about my accomplishment. He was not as proud as I had hoped. It really helps to lay on your side.... REALLY HELPS! I went on my first walk tonight... around 5 apartment buildings, and it was crazy painful, but I know it's good for me. Also the hot tub at the hospital was insanely AMAZING! My own tub doesn't work like that hot tub did, just like the ice at my house doesn't feel as good as the little packs they made for you at the hospital... but it's okay. I am already feeling better, thanks to the numbing cream my doc hooked me up with, and I can't wait for the day when I can just do whatever I want physically and jsut feel tired and not pain.

6. Breastfeeding is PAINFUL!!!

It was never a doubt in my mind to breast feed my children. It was something I had seen my Mom do and I had researched it and learned about it's amazing benefits. So I figured, sure, why not give it a shot. Never in a million years did I realize how painful it would be. How come no one ever tells you about that? I never understood why anyone wouldn't breastfeed unless there was a medical reasoning, but now I totally get it. I get so much anxiety when it comes time to feed Aniston. I'm sure she can sense it, which I'm thinking is probably a negative thing. The bonding experience is amazing, and the fact that out of Spencer and I, I am the only one who can do it makes me feel powerful, but I really wish guys could breastfeed. I couldn't describe the pain to Spencer or tell him exactly how hard she sucks, but then Aniston gave him his first hickey ever on his arm... so he kind of felt the pain. Supplementing has helped ease the pain a little, but it also tempts me to just bottle feed. I have nothing against those who only formula feed, it's a personal choice, and after experiencing breastfeeding first hand, I understand their choice. Just be aware of how painful breast feeding can be at first. I hear the pain eventually goes away, but I have yet to become desensitized. Make sure you educate yourself on the amazing products out there that can help you through this process like a nipple shield... whoever invented that is a very wealthy person I'm sure. I also highly recommend getting an appointment with a lactation specialist right after the baby is born, in order to help you learn the correct ways to breastfeed. I thought I was good to go because I fed Aniston within an hour of her being born and she latched right away and everything was great... but babies forget what their doing come to find out, and the emotional disappointment that you feel when your baby doesn't latch is kind of intense since this is your babies source of nutrients (please read that as if Nacho Libre is saying it) and food. You want to be able to give your baby the best, and when she doesn't latch it's pretty emotional and breaks your heart a little. My advice... when baby latches, keep her there until you can no longer stand it or she finishes. Just be prepared that breastfeeding isn't always the easiest thing in the world.

7. It's okay to ask for help.

I hate asking anyone for help. I really like to think that I can do anything and everything on my own. Having a child has humbled me. I quickly learned to say yes when the nurses asked me if I wanted them to take Aniston for the night and bring her in when she was ready to eat. This allowed me to rest knowing she was being watched over and taking care of. I learned to say yes, when my Mom offered the same services... MY MOM IS AMAZING! I learned to ask Spencer to do things for me that I never would've imagined anyone ever saying yes to because of the nasty factor... he never once told me no. Sometimes he even began offering to do certain things without me even asking. I learned to not hold back on any questions I had about my health or Aniston's when it came to the doctor. I cannot get enough information in that department and only want my baby to be as healthy as possible. I learned that it's okay to accept dinners when people offer them, but I also learned that that can be risky... People are so willing to help, and it's unfair to them to deny it. My AWESOME Aunt Julie drove 8 hours total yesterday just to come to Rexburg for 3 hours to help with the breastfeeding situation. Who does that? That was an amazing help. My Mom is here for a month! Away from her home, family, and husband... that's pretty awesome too. I don't think I could do that. But she wants to help me, and so I have had to learn how to let her help me, and I think that that's a good thing.

8. You can never be prepared.

You can have all the clothes in the world, nursery ready to go, diapers and wipes piled into a closet, parenting classes taken... but it will never be enough. It's overwhelming to be a first time parent, and I'm annoyed that TV shows make it out to seem so easy. It's anything but easy. What can prepare you for the rush of emotions when your baby has jaundice and has to get her heel pricked day after day and sit under lights all day? What can prepare you for hearing the cries of your baby and not knowing how to help her? What can prepare you for your previously spotless house turning  into a disaster zone, especially when you feel like you've been in bed or on the couch mostly so how did it ever get this messy? There's certain things that you just have experience in order to know how to handle them. Having a baby will change your life and open you up to a load of new experiences and emotions.

9. You learn about love you never knew existed.

I had always heard that you would fall in love with your baby immediately. This is the truth. It is overwhelming and beautiful. Spencer has constantly commented on how much I have changed in the past week. He says he never knew I could be so unselfish... that sounds bad on my part huh? You want to give everything and anything to your baby and nothing can stop you. You cannot stop staring at your baby amazed that that little human came out of you. You made that. You will love everything about your baby! I have never known instant love like that (minus anything new that Taco Bell creates). I'm so grateful to be able to experience that love and to know that it's 100% completely unconditional love. There is nothing that I wouldn't do for Aniston... and I have only had her in my arms for 5 days.

10. It takes two.

No one can sanely go through pregnancy alone. I'm sure it's possible, but I would never want to have to experience that. I'm so thankful for my wonderful husband and his desire to be a part of every single thing regarding Aniston. There's nothing that he won't do for the two of us ladies. I couldn't have gone through pregnancy without his support and love. I couldn't have thrown up everyday without him sitting behind me on the bathroom floor holding my hair back and constantly whispering how much he loved me in my ear. He seriously did that every time he was around when I was throwing up... day or night. So incredible! I couldn't have gone through getting so many IV's without him holding my hand and distracting me with promises of Taco Bell. I definitely couldn't have survived the move to Idaho while pregnant without him making sure wasn't doing anything to harm myself or the baby like lifting boxes or standing on chairs. I wouldn't have survived labor without him holding my foot and leg and telling me what an amazing job I was doing, even though I felt like no progress was being made. I wouldn't have survived the past week without him telling me constantly what a good job I was doing, even is Aniston refused to breastfeed or I woke him up a million times during the night to check her breathing even though I knew he had school and work the next day. I wouldn't be this happy while still physically feeling horrible if it hadn't been for Spencer. He has been there for me unwavering for the past 9 months and continues to make me feel like I'm a good Mom and doing everything right. He even tells me I'm beautiful daily... even though I am exhausted and hardly look like myself. No one should ever have to go through pregnancy alone. I'm so thankful that I had support, not only from Spencer but from his family and my family and from my friends. It has meant the world to me to have people involved in my life and I really couldn't be happier!

Here are some pictures of my little glow worm... Poor baby. Hopefully the jaundice will go away soon!

Introducing Aniston Kate

What a CRAZY past few days! There is absolutely nothing on earth that can prepare you for having your first child... NOTHING! I had loads of people giving me advice for months ahead of time, and I did appreciate the advice, but when it came time to start pushing and to have this little miracle... none of that advice mattered. So without further ado, I give to you the story of Aniston Kate Ahlstrom. ***WARNING*** I'm not skimping on the details so it may or may not gross you out.

We spent most of the 4th of July in the hospital. I was having crazy bad contractions within 2 minutes of each other and was dilated... however I was not dilating more than a 4. Even after hours of hard contractions my body remained solid and would not dilate. So they sent us home. I was pretty much a wreck and hated life and was having a hard time seeing the positive. We did have this AMAZING nurse named Marie when we were there who helped us so much and I seriously wanted to have the baby right then just so she could be the nurse there to help me. So the doctor prescribed me some Ambien, and they said that this would either stop the labor if it was false, or kick things into gear. So I went home and around 4pm and took an Ambien. I only slept for an hour before I woke up and helped Mom make dinner. I was kind of upset... I get super annoyed when I take a medication and it doesn't work the way it's suppose to. After dinner I started feeling super dizzy and sick and from there it was all down hill. I don't remember anything at all, but apparently it was one of the most terrifying nights for Spencer ever. I was so drugged I couldn't walk or stand without falling over, he said I was talking nonsense about a little man's party that I needed to attend, I kept drawing pictures with my fingers, and at one point he looked up at the bed (he was lying on the floor so he didn't get in my way... what a guy) and I was sitting up straight facing the wall... just sitting there, you know Paranormal Activity style.

After 12 hours of sleep I woke up on the 5th and realized that I kept leaking... It wasn't the usual urine leakage that occurs during pregnancy (super annoying) but it felt different. I called the doctor to make an appointment after a few hours of experiencing this, and luckily they had an appointment available at 10:40am. After I hung up the phone I realized that I had asked for the wrong doctor. My doctor works at a practice where there are several OBGYN's and if one is delivering a baby you get to see someone else. So I felt let down because I was sure I was going to be able to convince my doctor to get things started, but this other doctor seemed a little more strict. We got to the office and he checked me and told me that my water had not broken... then asked if I wanted him to strip my membranes. Since I had already had that done twice and we obviously saw no results, I didn't really want to put myself in unnecessary pain, but told him to go ahead... it couldn't do anything worse. Then a miracle occurred!!! My water broke... all over the doctor. He was pretty surprised and sent us straight to the hospital. I was thrilled to be going to the hospital knowing that they couldn't send me home this time and also knowing that the next time I would be going home, I would be going home with a baby!

When we got to the hospital, my doctor came in to talk to me and was surprised to find out the strict doctor broke my water while stripping my membranes... apparently he didn't tell him that, and he wasn't suppose to have done that. Oh well. Good thing I didn't tell him about the Nurse in his office who did it twice before. After being there a few hours I got my epidural while watching Les Miserables.... AMAZING!!! I highly recommend this and loved every second of it! I was a little bummed because I hadn't eaten breakfast and I heard that when you're in labor you can't eat. So I asked my nurse and she said it was up to me whether or not I ate, but if I did eat I could throw it up. Since I had already spent 9 months throwing up, I decided one more night wouldn't kill me and chowed down on a cheeseburger and fries and then some Cheetos. Best part about it... I didn't throw up! I was convinced at time during pushing I would, but it never happened. Around 6pm, super awesome nurse Marie walked in. I was on cloud nine. Spencer and I seriously were so happy to see her and that she was going to be with us while we had our baby. She is my favorite! I stayed dilated at a 4 for quite a few hours and began to get pretty upset about it. I couldn't understand why my body wasn't doing what it was suppose to be doing, but after I got that epidural I got up to a ten pretty quickly. Around 9pm they said it was time to start pushing... people had always told me that you'll know when it's time because you'll feel it, and I thought they were nuts! Well sure enough, there is a very distinct "pushing" feeling. Let's just say I'm not looking forward to my first bowel movement... in fact I'm pretty much terrified of this happening. Anyway, right before I go to push my doctor warns me.... his exact words "your baby doesn't have the smallest head I've ever felt." Really? Why would you say that to a pregnant woman about to give birth? Why? I can't say I was surprised because my family has a history of big heads, but still. After 1 1/2 hours of pushing, the nurse and Spencer were so helpful and amazing during this time and really tried to keep my spirits up, at 10:33pm on July 5th a little baby girl appeared. Pushing was a lot harder than I expected, and took a lot more work. I really have never sweated that much in my life ever! It didn't help that my heartburn was absolutely killer during the labor, but it was brutal. I have a new respect for every woman who gives birth more than once. It wasn't until the last 3 or 4 pushes that I felt like giving up, like I just couldn't do it anymore. I started crying and shaking my head, but the doctor just wouldn't give me a break. Normally I would push 3 or 4 times during a contraction, but at the end there are no breaks. The doctor just kept saying, "keep pushing, keep pushing." My anger I think is what got me through it and kept me pushing. Poor Spencer... I thought he was going to pass out, but he was strong and kept me focused.

From the time they placed my baby girl on my chest, until her first cry seemed to take hours! I was so worried about her and so shocked and amazed that she was actually here. The horrible nine months that it took to get her to our family didn't even seem to matter, all I wanted was to know that she was okay. She wasn't though. She had swallowed a significant amount of fluid and had to be taken away and put on oxygen and I couldn't hold her. I was able to watch from my bed, but the hospital staff did a pretty crappy job of keeping me informed about what was happening. Spencer called my Mom and she came right over. She was able to stand by the nurses while they took care of her and watched her. I kept myself distracted by exhaustion and the doctor who was lovingly sewing me up.... (note the sarcastic tone). I only tore to a first degree, thank goodness, but I tell you what... OUCH! (More on that to come). I wasn't prepared for the amount of blood that I would see in the upcoming days, or just how painful recovery would be. Once they brought the baby back to me, they wanted to try breastfeeding right away. This was one thing I was terrified for. I wasn't sure how it would feel, if she would latch, or how it worked really. But my little girl jumped on that bandwagon right away. It was a little painful at first but nothing crazy awful. I was able to get showered and they moved us to our new suite, which was pretty nice. Spencer and I stayed up talking about names, but just couldn't decide what to name her. So she was nameless for her first night on earth.

The first night was awful. I couldn't go to the bathroom by myself, I couldn't get out of bed or move by myself. After breastfeeding several times I began to experience pains I have never felt in my life! It was then that I noticed the bruises! My beautiful baby girl loves to eat, and eat aggressively! Every time it was time to feed it would take me a few minutes to brace myself. But as painful as it was, I wanted to push through it because I only want the best for my little girl and breastfeeding has such amazing benefits. My second night in the hospital however, I totally broke down. The pain was unbearable and I couldn't stop crying and Aniston was so upset because she was starving, so I asked Spencer to go find a nurse because I needed to figure out my options and how to feed my baby. When my sister had Cortney, she also had some complications which forced her to supplement with formula, so I thought that maybe I could do that and work up to be able to strictly breastfeed later on. When Spencer came back into the room after looking for the nurse, he was so mad! Apparently when he went out to talk to the lactation specialist and told the nurse at the desk about what was happening and what we were thinking about doing, she started yelling at him and telling him that there's no other way to feed Aniston except for breastfeeding, and that supplementing wasn't an option and that I just needed to buck up and do what every other mother would do. Basically she told him I wasn't being a good Mom and that I was being selfish... Spencer didn't hold back when it came to telling her exactly how he felt about what she said (love him). Another nurse quickly came to our rescue after overhearing the conversation. She quickly came into the room and apologized and gave me amazing advice and taught me how to supplement and set me up on a plan to be able to slowly build up to feeding my daughter more and more. She was my life savor and such a crutch for me that night. The next morning before discharge we found out that even our doctor heard about the exchange between Spencer and the nurse and apologized. Everyone's situation is different, and the only thing I was concerned about was making sure my daughter is eating enough and is healthy and happy, and whatever I have to do I will do it. If that means supplementing for a while then so be it. Since I have started supplementing I haven't felt like an unfit mother because I couldn't do what I originally wanted. I feel like I am doing the best thing and providing for my daughters health. And she loves it! She is so happy when she eats, and to be honest, I'm not sure I could produce enough milk at this moment to fill her needs. Spencer asked me the other day which was worse.... labor or breastfeeding, and I couldn't answer him.

I was so blessed to have some of my cheerleaders and fellow coach come visit me in the hospital, which made me happy. I really feel blessed to be able to be involved in that program and it was just amazing for them to come and say hi. I was also blessed to have my Mom there. I was so blessed, and continue to be blessed that she is here everyday. I have so many questions, and Spencer and I don't know all the answers and we need advice. My Mom is a GREAT Nana and Aniston loves her already. I admire her ability to change diapers so quickly and to calm and relax her. I always knew my Mom was smart, but I now I'm learning that she has an entire other level of information that I need access to and that she is willing to share. The emotional support she has given me has been amazing! Than you Dad for letting her come stay for a month. It is a HUGE blessing!

So the morning of my discharge I began to be extremely sick and dizzy and in a lot of pain. It was kind of scary and we weren't sure if I had an infection or what was going on. After the doctor checked my stitches and everything, it looked great, so he drugged me up. The pain is still pretty intense and I'm in bed a lot, and we have learned that even 2 percocet isn't even enough to ease the pain. But I know it will get better and I have and AMAZING husband and Mom who have been helpful and deal with my crying and pain. Aniston had her final check and everything looked good and we were cleared to go home. Leaving the hospital was a little intense... I couldn't believe they were letting me leave the hospital with a baby. With my baby! But coming home was awesome!

I always knew that I wanted to be a Mom and have children. I wish people would tell you how painful recovery actually is... but I wouldn't change my pain for the world. I feel so blessed and lucky to have this beautiful daughter in my life. Watching Spencer with her has been one of my highlights of this entire experience. He is so amazing with her and she absolutely loves him! She is definitely Daddy's little girl. I knew he was going to be a great Dad, but I had no idea how good. I feel lucky that as much as he loves and adores her, his first priority is still helping me. When I was crying and unmovable from the pain, he makes sure my Mom or a nurse was there to take care of Aniston and then he only focuses on me. He cheers me on through breastfeeding, constantly telling me how good I'm doing, and he lets me know that I am doing a good job. That means the world to me. I am definitely a lucky girl!

We love watching Aniston grow. She has changed so much already it's unbelievable. We love how she sings when she sleeps. It lets us know she's okay and it's just so darn cute! We love her dark hair, and her cute chubby cheeks! She has the same coloring I had as a baby as well as my hair and nose, but the rest of her is all Spencer! That boy has got some strong genes! But my hair gene won out on this one. Haha. She's adorable... but I might be a little biased.

So I know this post is super long and maybe boring and TMI, but I use this blog as a journal also and so it was important that I wrote everything out. Be prepared for lots and lots of pictures!!!! Also, thank you to all of you who have expressed congrats and prayers for our family! We feel blessed to have all of you in our lives.

Remember Last Year....

Last year rocked!!! Best 4th ever!

This year sucked!!! No fireworks, no BBQ, no parade (it was my first one with MHS), no water games or swimming.

I need to have a do over with my favorite holiday. Cause as of this moment, we are not on good terms, and I am seriously depressed.

Membranes, Mom & a Moose

There has been a TON of excitement during the past day and a half in the Ahlstrom household. I think that the most exciting thing of all is that I have had my membranes stripped TWICE in the past 24 hours. First of all let's talk about the pain... Holy crap! I understand that pregnancy is painful and that labor is going to be even worse, but I was not prepared for the stripping of the membranes. The doctor just kind of did it without telling me she was going to do it, which I guess was good for the first time, but the second time I knew what I was getting myself into. All I could do was just think to myself... "baby, baby, baby". At this point we are willing and ready to do anything, and  mean anything, that we need to in order to have this baby, so if that means enduring a little (understatement) pain, so be it. The stripping has helped though.... I'm now dilated to a 4 and definitely didn't sleep last night because the back labor was soooooo intense. Spencer and I have talked since we found out we were pregnant and due in July about how cool it would be to have her on the Fourth of July. It has always been my favorite holiday, but last year Spencer made it especially special by proposing during the parade. So why not add another special moment to such an amazing day? If this actually happens, I will seriously be amazed and I will feel extremely blessed, because even when we talked about it I was pretty sure it wouldn't happen, but now there's a very good chance that it actually will happen. I also have total hobbit feet! They are so swollen and my ankles have completely disappeared! It's been pretty warm here in Idaho, so I'm sure that doesn't help.

Also my Mom is here!!!! Hooray! She will be here until August, which is a long time, but I couldn't be more excited about it! It kind of makes the whole baby actually coming soon more realistic... not that contractions don't do that for me. It was actually her idea to talk to the doctor about stripping the membranes, so her being here has already been genius! I also have someone to keep me company while Spencer is away at school and work so that's really nice.

So last night during our routine walk around our apartment complex, this dude asked us if we had seen the moose....I'm sure he thought we were super stuck up by the reaction we gave him by looking at him like he was insane, but sure enough once we got around to the front of the complex, there was a moose trapped in a construction area that had been fenced off. How it even got in there I have no idea, but I can tell you it was the most exciting thing to happen in Rexburg for a while. There were 2 security cars and 6 police cars. 6 police cars seriously???? So the were finally able to coax the moose out of the construction zone and 6 inches away from me. Once it came out of the fenced area it just started running like crazy and came directly at Spencer and I. We were sure it was going to jump the short fence that separated us from the beast, but it didn't. Instead it ran around to the driveway and ran into the complex... I ran also. I booked it when I saw that huge animal coming towards me... disappointed that it didn't make me go into serious labor... if a heart attack and a good run don't put me into labor, will anything? Anyway, it definitely was an interesting experience.

Now I'm off to get dilated and get this baby out! Wish me luck!!!

Huge, Hot and Ready To Go

My sympathies go out to every single woman who has ever been pregnant in the summer! I'm so thankful that I don't have to be pregnant all summer long... even though it feels like pregnancy will never end at this point. Unfortunately, we don't have A/C. That really sucks, but we are on the bottom floor so if we keep the blinds shut it stays pretty cool and we have an awesome fan which follows me around the house from room to room. We attempt to keep cool by spending time at the city's pool when we can (okay so we've only been once), as well as at my parents house here in Rexburg jumping on the trampoline with the sprinklers turned on... Yes, we are children. It really does feel amazing though, plus it's free, and the best part is that the house is empty and there's no little children running around screaming and splashing at us (yes, I actually do like kids, just not the annoying ones at the pool). Along with renewing our childhood love of backyard fun, we have also fell in love all over again with Otter Pops! They may or may not cause my heart burn to flare up, so we switch in between those lovely acidic treats and Arctic Circle's .79 cent ice cream cones. A-M-A-Z-I-N-G!

Staying cool isn't the only pregnancy issue I am struggling with... Being in the last 2 weeks of pregnancy (hopefully shorter... cross your fingers for me) I am no longer fitting into much of my clothing. Yes, I haven't spent much money on pregnancy clothing, mostly because I would rather spend it on new clothing after the baby comes, but with today's style's a lot of my clothing allowed for my bump to grow and they still kept me covered... Now, not so much. I find myself constantly pulling down my shirt to cover my belly, while pulling up the legs on my sweat pants to not overheat. Feeling rather large. It doesn't help that Spencer points it out every day... not rudely, he just stares at my belly and comments on it's enormousness. I don't know if there is any way to effectively communicate to a man the experience of pregnancy. I know that they experience it too through our hormones and what not, but besides straight up telling them that you're uncomfortable and trying to explain the pains of contractions, there's no way for them to know exactly what it's like. Also, if one more guy tells me to buck up because getting kicked in their "special" area is a thousand times worse than having a baby, I will physically do them harm as well as some kind of witchcraft you can learn online to impose constant vomiting, nausea, and insensate urination. Seriously guys... be a little sympathetic... and you wonder why you're not married.

Spencer made me pack my hospital bag as well as a bag for the baby a few weeks ago, just in case and because I have a doctor that has diarrhea of the mouth and gives false hope, so we are ready in that aspect. I am getting to the point of extreme annoyance when I see the bags or even look into the babies room. That makes me cringe a little bit because that sounds awful, but my pregnancy is awful and I am so done. As excited as I am for baby girl to get here, I am more excited to not be pregnant. I have to admit that I will miss the look of being pregnant. I have always had such a huge body issue problem, and since becoming pregnant, I haven't struggled with that. No one can call you fat when you're pregnant... but other than that I am really looking forward to not throwing up several times a day, and losing the heartburn, and I cannot wait to sleep on my stomach again!!! The jealousy I feel towards Spencer when I wake up in the middle of the night and he's sleeping on his stomach, is really brutal. I am also jealous of anyone who can take medication... my body becomes completely immune to any and all medication when I'm pregnant, which is not awesome, and leads the doctor to tell us there's nothing they can do. I think that pregnancy is going to make me much more thankful for a lot more things in my life.

So while we wait patiently (yeah right) for the arrival of baby, I will continue to follow the advice of Dwight Schrute and constantly use the fitness orb... while eating ice cream of course. Here's to hoping the next post is about a new little person in my life. Also I love love love pringles!

Date Night

Spencer and I were able to go on a long overdue date night tonight!!! It didn't last very long and we didn't do much and it didn't involve Taco Bell, but we had a blast and it was super nice to get dressed up (by dressed up I mean not wearing sweats and flip flops) and actually go out in public. I don't wear makeup very often, but I haven't worn it at all in weeks! And let's be honest... I haven't really even gotten "dressed" in weeks. I have been a little depressed the past couple weeks, and after a doctor's visit today (lost 3 pounds), I am officially on medication to help deal with the pain (vomiting) that I am experiencing. Basically pregnancy just isn't what I had thought or hoped it would be, so it makes me a little sad. So it was nice to feel somewhat decent looking going out tonight. So while Spencer was off taking tests, I got ready...

How do you like my high school Facebook picture taking skills... Seriously, I am friends with a lot of high school kids (no I'm not creep, just a coach) on Facebook and they post so many pictures of themselves like this. It's just weird. It's also probably a little weird that Spencer is friends with many high school cheerleaders on Facebook... that's creepy. Anyway, Spencer was super surprised and happy when he got home to see me up and about and ready to go out... that is until I made him take a belly picture for me.

He is amazed daily at the size of my belly. I don't mean to brag or anything, and maybe it's because  the pregnancy has been so rough, but no stretch marks! I am truly blessed and knocking on wood that I don't wake up tomorrow covered with lines. Huge blessing considering that I feel like a whale! So we decided to go to a movie. Spencer has been wanting to go for a while now and I kept saying no because it's just so hard for me to sit for that long, but I gave in tonight. He has put up with a lot lately... yesterday I woke up choking on my own vomit cause I had thrown up while sleeping and it really scared him because he really doesn't want me to die from being pregnant... and he has just been beyond amazing to me, so I figured I could do this little thing for him.

I have learned that if I smile not showing my teeth during these, the final days of pregnancy, I don't look so chubby... We decided to see What to Expect When You Are Expecting... So funny! Maybe because it's something we are going through right now, but we were laughing so hard. I did eventually have to get up and stand in the back of the theater, where these teenage boys thought it was the best thing ever that I was so pregnant and watching that movie... they also smelt horribly of B.O. that was nasty. Darn pregnancy nose... I can smell everything and anything within 500 feet of me. This is dangerous when it comes to food and cravings. I don't get to go by Taco Bell very often in order to save us money. The best thing about living in Rexburg is that for $14 you can get 2 adult 7pm movie tickets, 2 large drinks, and a large popcorn. Don't forget that anything that is sized large gets free refills!!!! And it is that BEST popcorn ever! You cannot beat that deal! And if you go before 5pm it's only $12... Good old college town!

I highly recommend this movie! I did cry my way through the ending (stinking hormones) but it was a great date! Now I get to get into my sweats, take my drugs, which also act as a sleeping pill (BONUS), and fall asleep watching some awesome reality TV show.

THANK YOU Spencer for such a wonderful date night! I'm sorry it had to end at 9pm, but I'm glad we got to spend time together doing something we enjoy! I will make it up to you by giving you a daughter... how about that? Deal?