Serenity Prayer

A while back, I mean before the days of Spencer, I had a friend ask me to go with him to an LDS recovery meeting. This is similar, I'm guessing, to what an AA meeting or any kind of meeting for an addiction would be like. Of course I went because I wanted to be able to show my support to this friend and to help him through his recovery. I was surprised by the stories and strength that I felt in that room and even though I did not say anything (really regret that) I felt welcomed. I've heard words to the Serenity Prayer a lot in my life, not because I am surrounded by addicts, but in movies and on facebook and what not. They are some powerful words. Maybe it's because I am pregnant, or maybe it's because I'm normally fairly emotional, but lately I think about them a lot and get weepy. The prayer states:

"God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,

Courage to change the things I can,

And wisdom to know the difference"

I think that in society we lack as a people the three most important things in that prayer.

We lack the ability to accept. I know that I am awful at accepting when things have ended or that something is different or when a change needs to be made. I think that half of my own life has been spent in denial. I so often wish that things could just stay the same always because that is what feels most comfortable and that is what seems most easy, but life is about change. It's about growing, and growing cannot occur without change. There are so many changes that occur outside our realm of control, and because as a people we like to have control all the time. Losing that control makes it that much harder to accept those changes in our lives. I am convinced that if as a people we obtained complete acceptance of all changes what were indeed inevitable, there would be no anger, unhappiness, or even suicide. Too often we become carried away in wildly unsuccessful efforts to fight these changes, that it changes us. Our countenance darkens and we become a shell of the person we once were. To learn to accept those things which we cannot change, is to learn to be happy. It may seem weak to give up the fight against the world, but it's certainly not that at all. It's the complete opposite. It is strength. It is to conquer.

We lack courage. Mostly I think the courage to change. Like I said before, change is hard to make and we don't always welcome it into our lives. I know I have pushed and pushed change away time and time again, but that's funny considering that right now I am in a situation where I cannot push the change away. In fact, I have no control over the changes and it has taught me so much about acceptance and courage. I wish men could be pregnant, just so they could understand and learn about accepting change and having that courage and strength day after day to keep going. Okay, so that's not the only reason I wish men could experience pregnancy, but what better teacher than that? The lion in the Wizard of Oz only seeks courage. This is his one wish. I'm pretty sure if I only had one wish, it would not be to have courage. Okay, actually I'm 100% sure that wouldn't be my wish. But if only we all had that courage. The courage to step out of the box and to not worry about what others think so that we could make those important changes in our lives. Surely opportunity would not present itself as a needful change if it weren't important. By gaining the courage to change, we also could gain more than we ever hoped for, and a life that was previously shadowed by doubt.

We lack wisdom. Every single person I have ever met is smart about something. Then there is my brother Ryan who is a genius and is smart about everything. But everyone has a great knowledge of one thing or another. I think that the reason we lack wisdom is because we seek it out from the wrong sources. We assume that those closest to us, or those people who we look up to and respect are the ones who can give us the greatest advice and fill our own lives with their wisdom. But this is unfortunately not always the case. Although they may have the best intentions of teaching us correctly, they may not understand our situation correctly or know our reactions the best. I love learning from other people, I love reading quotes from inspiring historical figures, but once I have learned those important lessons, I don't always retain them. I don't always remember; therefore, I lose that wisdom. If I don't practice, every single day, that wisdom passed down to me from others, then I will not be wise. No one can be wise. We as a people lack the energy and motivation to keep ourselves wise and in check, making sure that everyday we are living by the wisdom and principles that have been taught to us. In turn, we lack wisdom.

I know that I could be better off if I learned acceptance, gained courage, and treasured wisdom. It astounds me that this prayer is primarily used for those with addictions, when I think that every single person in the world could gain something from these three characteristics. How different the world would be if everyone, everyday, would strive to live by this prayer.