Monday, July 30, 2012

Happy Birthday Daddy!

Yesterday was Spencer's birthday. He has finally caught up to me in age and turned the big 2-6. For the record.... I am 2 days shy of being exactly 6 months older than him; therefore, I am the wiser one. (So not even close to being true). Lucky for us my Mom is still in town and was able to babysit for us so we could go out on our first official date since the birth and it was awesome! Although I did fight the urge to call every 20 minutes to see if Aniston was okay. Spencer wanted to go to the movies and chose to see the new Batman.

 I loved  loved loved it! I definitely cried hard and solid the last 5 minutes of the movie and the entire drive home. Like seriously crying ginormous tears... I didn't even really cry when my child was born (does this make me a bad parent?). Of course after the 9 months of purgatory I went through to get her here, I was just more relieved than anything, so tears weren't necessary. I did spend the first 30 minutes of the movie paranoid that the exit door would open up (please tell me I'm not the only one who does this kind of thing and worries constantly after something like that happens) but nothing happened of course and I was able to enjoy the movie. Yes, about 15 minutes in I had to say a prayer to calm myself... and luckily it worked. I just get so freaked out about stuff like that. I still get super nervous when I am in any library and it's been 13 years! Big problem there is that I love to read. My mind is just bizarre. So Batman was wonderful. The next night (we celebrate birthday week, not just the day in our family) we went to dinner and to Cold Stone (thank you Mom for the gift card).

Normally we would never eat at Cold Stone. Not because we don't like it (who doesn't like Cold Stone? Because we do, but because it's just so darn expensive! Ummm, hello! College students on a budget! How they even manage to survive in Rexburg is beyond me. But it was amazing and even Aniston got in on the action with her tiny mini spoon.

I thought it was really funny, but apparently I'm the only one. I also (during church... my bad) fat boothed my daughter...

Does anyone else notice a similarity between my daughter and a certain Star Wars character??? (Hint... he's pretty chubby) I was laughing so hard (children do not make you more mature)! Maybe I will mature with my daughter... chances that she matures before me are quite high actually. On Spencer's actual birthday (Sunday birthday's are the worst!!!) we gave him his presents (2 new shirts, one from me and one from Ani) and just hung out.

I love this picture of Spencer and Aniston together... he really is such a good Dad!

She is a very lucky little girl! He even alternates night feedings with me so that I don't have to get up every time! AMAZING! Also Aniston prefers Spencer's pinky finger to almost anything else (besides real food... my daughter eats like she's never eaten before every time!!!).

The pinky even calms her down when she's screaming bloody murder! And because I was such an awful child... she screams loud, long, and hard at times. It's my pay back... and it was expected. The pinky is basically the best thing ever! And just so you can see the results of her eating... check out that belly!!!

Chubby bunny!!!!

 Happy Birthday Spencer! We are so blessed to have you in our lives and we can't wait to spend eternity with you! WE LOVE YOU!!!!

Tuesday, July 24, 2012

Single Life vs. Mom Life

Before I say anything else, let me say it loud and clear... I SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO PREFER MOM LIFE!!! I cannot believe that I waited 26 years to have a baby, but that was the timing that was right for me in my life and it is so perfect! It really is everything that I imagined and so much more! I have however, noticed changes in my life. Changes that I was never really fully prepared for or even considered. Hopefully this will open the eyes of those who are expecting and make those of you who have experienced it laugh a little and relate to me a little... Here are the changes that have occurred in my life in the past 17 days:

1. Laundry day is every day. I used to get by with doing laundry only every other week (We may or may not have a lot of clothes) when it was just Spencer and I... Now I do a load of laundry at least every day! Between the occasional spitting up which usual conquers not only her clothing but a blanket, burp rag and my clothes and has gotten the bedding quite a few times as well, the explosive diapers (beware... they usually happen when you are out and about or hanging out with friends) and just normal laundry (now that I have started to actually get dressed for the day and not wearing the same thing day after day) it just piles up! In 2007 I moved to Provo, UT and at that time my Mom gave me a huge bucket of laundry soap. I'm still using that laundry soap and it's gone from half full to practically empty in two weeks! I haven't bought laundry soap in 5 years!!! I honestly don't even know how to buy laundry soap or which kind is best to buy! Yes, I'm having a mini break down about this. I just need to take a deep breath and relax. Basically, laundry never stops with a baby! Thank you Mom and Dad for the washer and dryer!!!

2. Your senses evolve. I was well aware that babies spit up, poop all the time, and that gross things would occur daily. I didn't however, factor in the gross things that I would be going through at the same time, but all together there's a lot of new nasty that has been introduced into my life, but for some reason it doesn't matter to me at all. I don't care when she spits up all over me, it doesn't matter when she burps nasty formula burps directly in my face. The liquidy poopy diapers make us laugh instead of making us throw up a little, and when she poops in her tub, we take it like a champ without flinching. I feel like my senses have evolved for the sake of my survival as well as the for the sake of my baby. It's quite an amazing experience! Spencer even let me spit this nasty wasabi wrap sample into his hand at the store, in public, after it made me gag... we didn't even think twice about it. My sense of smell has heightened to the point where I know if she even has a wet diaper, my sense of hearing is AMAZING - I can hear her spit up even when I'm in a different room of the house and I can hear her breathe in the wee hours of the morning when I'm awake and wondering if she's okay. My sense of touch has softened and has never known anything more spectacular as the touch of my own child's skin and hair. There's also the most amazing feeling in the world... Having her little hand curled around my finger. Aniston loves to be held. If we put her down anywhere whether it's in her crib, on the boppy, or in her swing, she does okay for a few minutes and then she whines until we pick her up and then she smiles and becomes so happy and so content to just be held by either Spencer or I. And yes, we believe that she is really smiling... no way that every time we pick her up she has gas. My sense of taste unfortunately has not changed, but that's also a good thing I think, and my sense of sight has never been so good. I have trained my eyes to be able to see her tiny chest moving up and down even in the dead of night from 5 feet away! I kind of feel like a super hero with super powers because of my heightened senses.

(kind of looks likes she's flipping you off... my bad)

3. Diapers with a soiled indicator are AMAZING! There are so many different types of diapers to choose from (all expensive) but the ones with the indicator that let's you know when your baby has soiled a diaper are incredible! The person who invented them should be a millionaire!!! Genius idea! Makes life so much easier! Also I'm almost 100% positive that it was a man who invented them...

4. Naps, bathing, and eating are a luxury. It's sad, but so true. Even when Aniston is sleeping I won't take a shower because I'm scared that in the 2 minutes that I could effectively bathe, something will happen. I have to wait until Spencer gets home, but then there's so much to do with the two of us that time just disappears and the bathing just doesn't always happen like it use to. They say you should sleep when baby sleeps, but then how does anyone get anything done? When she's asleep I move her to whatever room needs cleaning and clean, then by the time I'm done she's awake and ready to eat. Once she eats she falls back asleep (unless it's at 2am when she wants to be awake and play) and we start the cycle all over again. Spencer often asks me well into the day what I've eaten, and most of the time I can honestly say nothing. That's not such a good thing, especially when it comes to nursing and what not. My day starts when she wakes up early and is ready to eat, and ends when she eats and goes to sleep. She is my top priority and my needs come second to hers. I love my food, but these days I'm just too tired to remember to eat.

5. Baby wears the pants. Maybe it's just my family but we often talk about different couples and who wears the pants in their relationships. Sometimes it's the girl, sometimes it's the guy, and sometimes it's fairly even. Spencer and I think our relationship fits into that fairly even category, but now everything is different. Our schedules and our life and what we do and when we do it completely revolve around Aniston and what she wants to do and when she wants to do it. Who knew that such a little baby could have such control over life. Lucky for us she's not too demanding so far.

6. Your house may never be clean clean again. I can keep the living room pretty clean, but the kitchen these days always seems to be littered with baby bottles and formula and nursing materials... the bath room now hosts a baby bath and all of her bathing essentials in addition to all of our stuff we already had in there. In the morning when we wake up in our room there are bottles everywhere, on both nightstands and on the desk, from her late night/early morning feedings, and then of course there's the laundry everywhere and honestly I have probably made the bed twice since Aniston has been born. Hopefully I can learn to manage my time better, but for right now it is what it is. This is why we don't invite people deeper into our house past the living room. Aniston's room has tons of clothes in baskets that need to be put away and flowers and headbands everywhere, but that cleaning just hasn't happened yet. I'm pretty excited that the living space that most people see is able to stay clean, but my goal this next week is to get the entire house clean and then to keep it clean... That is if I can tear myself away from holding my super cute baby and kissing her chubby little cheeks!

7. Your husband changes completely... for the better. Spencer has always been a supportive and amazing husband (I am so lucky), but since having Aniston he has been even more AMAZING! He gets up and feeds her at night (this is why I pump... haha) he changes her diaper when she needs it (most of the time) and he has been so helpful in every other way. He makes sure I am eating and let's me take my much needed baths at night. He even watches Aniston so that I can attempt to take naps! He drives slower, works harder, and loves her so much more than he loves anything else... besides me of course. Being a father is probably the best thing that could ever happen to Spencer and I feel so blessed that I get to be such a huge part of it!

Those are just some of the changes that I have experienced so far, and even though I am usually reluctant to change, these have been amazing changes and I wouldn't want life to be any different. Not being prepared for the changes were probably a good thing because it has forced me to adapt and to learn to accept change. These days as long as Aniston is happy and healthy and I at least remember to brush my teeth and to put on deodorant we are golden!

Sunday, July 22, 2012

BBQ With a Side of Super Cute Baby!

Yesterday we had a BBQ with some of our friends who live in our apartment complex. It was great weather, not too hot and definitely not cold, great food, and it was just fun to be out and about instead of on bed rest or feeling too sick to go out. Loving not being pregnant anymore! Not only do I no longer have heartburn (BEST THING EVER!), but I don't throw up every night anymore, I'm not super nauseous, and I can function like a normal person (almost... if you consider being able to workout normal, I'm not quite there yet). But the best thing about no longer being pregnant is having Miss Aniston here  and to be able to hold her and kiss her and of course dressing her up in all her cute little clothes and flowers and headbands and bows! I did end up having to leave earlier than I would have liked because I forgot my beloved boppy to sit on and I got super sore super fast from sitting on the bench! But it was nice to be able to actually go out and do something. Let's rewind to the boppy... I L-O-V-E the boppy! So does Aniston.... Sometimes we have to fight over who gets to use it... She always wins. Seriously for all of my friends out there who are expecting (and there are a ton!) Buy a boppy! It's the most comfortable thing in the world to sit on while you're healing from pushing that precious baby out of you! It also comes in handy for the baby. Highly recommend the boppy! Anyway, of course I spent a good amount of time taking pictures of Aniston, who decided to sleep through the entire BBQ, waking up only long enough to eat, be burped for 20 minutes, then decide that she didn't want to burp, and then 10 minutes later spits up all over her stroller and clothes. Oh well, just another reason to change her into something cuter! It's tough in the summer because it's so hot that I'm paranoid about her over heating so most of the time she just wears onesies... I try to compensate by making sure she has a cute headband on, but at 2 weeks old she already likes to pull them off. Stubborn child! I'm suppose to be able to dress her however I want in the first years of life an already she is fighting me about it! No bueno! And because I cannot delete pictures of my baby, you get a ton to look at that will probably all look the same to you... Enjoy!

Spencer as the grill master

It was a little windy... Also I look exhausted because Aniston likes to be awake at night and sleep during the day so don't judge me.

Check out the spit up all over her blanket.... thank you daughter!

Poor little face... we took her gloves off her hands so that they wouldn't get too dry and she scratched herself within seconds. Thank goodness babies heal so fast!

Check out my super cool MHS shirt!!! We had a cheer fundraiser earlier in the day and I was definitely too tired to change. Go Bobcats!

On a side note... As a new mother of a two week old baby, the shooting that occurred in Colorado terrifies me. I feel a little guilty bringing a child into a world where you can't even feel safe going to the movies anymore. The movies are one of my favorite places to go! What also terrifies me is that I have actually been to and watched a movie in that exact movie theater in Aurora, Colorado when I was dating a guy who lived there back in the day. I guess because I can still remember sitting there and watching The Ringer, it made it easier for me to visualize this horrific event. My heart and prayers go out to all those affected by this one man's choice, especially his own family who now has to live with this tragic event for the rest of their lives. We all have our agency to choose what we want to do with our lives, and he obviously made a terrible decision. No movie, no person, no event can "make us" do something. We choose our attitudes and our actions and how we are going to be affected by the media we watch and read and listen to or by how somebody treats us. I personally don't feel as though the new Batman movie (which I'm still really excited to see... eventually) is the reason this young man decided to do what he did, and it makes me sad that those actors and the director (who is one of my absolute favorites and still should have won the Oscar in 2011 for best original screenplay) should feel responsible and be blamed for this. They worked hard to entertain us and it was just sad that that was the movie he chose to interrupt. I hope that I can find some way to teach my daughter that there is happiness and joy to be found in the world. And that from even such tragic events you can still find understanding and love and a way to improve life. My Dad is a very strong advocate of attitude and I hope to be able to instill in Aniston the belief that life is all about attitude. I absolutely love this quote and hope that I can learn to more fully believe and live my own life according to these words;

“The longer I live, the more I realize the impact of attitude on life. Attitude, to me, is more important than facts. It is more important than the past, the education, the money, than circumstances, than failure, than successes, than what other people think or say or do. It is more important than appearance, giftedness or skill. It will make or break a company... a church... a home. The remarkable thing is we have a choice everyday regarding the attitude we will embrace for that day. We cannot change our past... we cannot change the fact that people will act in a certain way. We cannot change the inevitable. The only thing we can do is play on the one string we have, and that is our attitude. I am convinced that life is 10% what happens to me and 90% of how I react to it. And so it is with you... we are in charge of our Attitudes.”

Life is precious and you never know when it's going to end. Take advantage of everyday and love life. Being afraid of life will bring you no fulfillment and will only bring you sorrow. Be the person you want to be and don't worry about how others view you. I struggle heavily with this and hope that from this tragic event I can realize that I can be happy and love myself and my life without the approval of others. From this awful situation I choose to change my attitude and to become a better and happier person. My life is good... in fact my life in great! Everyday I choose to be depressed because I don't look like the gorgeous girl down the street or I don't fit into my old jeans two weeks after giving birth or that I am not rich, is a HUGE waste of time. Instead I will focus on how I am married to a man who thinks I am beautiful and tells me this everyday or how I have a beautiful baby girl to hold in my arms and who I love so much that it's making me cry right now or how I only have 11 pounds to go before I'm back to pre-pregnancy weight and not 50 pounds or how I am getting my masters and my husband is working on his bachelors so that we can provide a wonderful life for our family in the future. I will strive to be more positive about life and hopefully through my actions I will be able to instill in my daughter those same values. I challenge everyone to do the same. Re-evaluate your life and make sure it's all that you want it to be and more!

Thursday, July 19, 2012

Wednesday Walk

I'm finally starting to feel a little bit more like myself, so we ventured out for a walk around our apartment complex. Honestly, it was a lot easier and more comfortable when I was pregnant to do so. I'm, just about done with these stitches! They suck basically, and they are restrictive and painful and I am just so ready to exercise and be active and not have to worry about pulling out stitches or dealing with the pain of them anymore. Anyway it was a great walk! Despite the physical pain and waking up at all hours of the night, I am the most happy I have ever been! I love my little family and I feel so blessed!

Spencer loved using the carrier! Such a proud papa!

Family Photo!!!!

I made Spencer hold the bottom of the carrier because I was so worried that Aniston was going to fall through and get all broken on the cement. I'm a little paranoid...

Close up on the protection of the Daddy hold.

She wasn't even sleeping... She just didn't want me to take her picture... Sassy

I love how she held on to the front of the carrier and sucked on her little fingers almost the entire walk.

She wrinkles her forehead the exact same way that I do! Love it!

I swear our apartment complex is infested with ants! They are everywhere!!!!

Still coping with post-baby body. I feel so uncomfortable and not attractive. I am so blessed to have a husband who tells me how beautiful I am everyday, I just wish I could wholeheartedly believe him. I have never had such a desire to exercise in my life! This may actually be the worst picture ever...

My daughter uses more expensive shampoo than I do... One of my cheerleaders brought this as a gift for Aniston and I love it! Smells so good!

Monday, July 16, 2012

Aniston's First Photo Shoot

Kim and Cortney drove from Oregon to come and spend a couple days with us folk in Idaho. It was nice to be able to see them since it had been about 4 months since we'd last seen them. Cortney is growing up so fast and loved spending time with her new little cousin. It was fun to see them be able to interact with each other... Well Aniston didn't really interact much, but Cortney loved seeing her.

While they were here we added to Kim's photography portfolio once again by having her take pictures of Aniston. Kind of crazy that in the past year Kim has taken our engagements, bridals, wedding, maternity and now our baby's pictures. Aniston was a trooper... She did get a little sassy towards the end, but overall I'm happy with the pictures we got and thankful that Kim was able to take them for us. Thank you Kim and good work!!!!

Love this smile!!! Aniston smiles all the time (and I don't think it's just gas... even though she is extremely gassy) and it just melts my heart! Also love love love the dimples!!! I feel so blessed to have such a beautiful daughter!

Kim made this cute little bunny outfit and it fit just perfectly!

She didn't quite fit on top of the suitcase.... this was also taken at the end of the shoot when she started to get sassy!

Hate that we didn't use a diaper cover and that you can see the bandage on her poor little foot, but I love the hat and her elephant!

This might be my favorite picture of the entire bunch! I love everything about it... even though she's not wearing a bow.

Poor little foot....

Love those chubby cheeks!!!


Vegas show girl anyone???

I want to squeeze those fingers!

Love, love, love the lips!!!!

I personally didn't want to be in any of the pictures... but this one might be my favorite out of the ones we did take. Blah!

I feel so blessed to have such a beautiful daughter. She truly is the best parts of Spencer and I put together and it's amazing to be able to look at her and to see what she got from me and what she got from Spencer. She's changing everyday and basically being a Mom is the best thing ever!!!!