Making the Change...

"I think it's naive to pray for world peace if we're not going to change the form in which we live." Godfrey Reggio

I am happy, truly happy, for the first time in a long time. Of course there are little things that don't matter to anyone but me that I would like to change in my life, but they unimportant and are of the vain things of the world. But overall I am happy. I'm feeling pretty sick at the moment, mostly from stress... not the best way to spend my last day of freedom before I enter the world of screaming, drama, makeup, bra straps, cheering, chanting, stunting, tumbling, dancing, crying, laughing, eating, eye rolling, and no boyfriend (although that started today... tear... please take a moment to be sad for me. We won't get to talk until maybe Thursday night and won't see each other until Friday). Spencer keeps me pretty sane and I am going to need that this week, so hopefully I will find an outlet to help me to keep my sanity until we can see each other again. I love coaching, don't get me wrong, but this year, and especially today, I am very stressed about it. I feel disorganized and I feel a lack of willingness from some of my new girls. At this point, I have taught them what they need to know, and spent a lot of time training them for their routine tomorrow, and I'm just not sure they are ready. This scares me because I want them to excel and to be the best that they can be, but if they don't want it, how am I supposed to help them? I explained to them at our 6am practice (heavy groan) that if they don't show improvement, because this is a team sport and everyone needs to be close to each other in ability, they will be removed. Oh well if that hurt their feelings... that's life. I would hate to kick of of them off, but I cannot let my team suffer at the hand of one or two lazy people. While considering this, I find it to me like my own life. I have several friends that I drug me down emotionally and taken advantage of me. This doesn't make me a better person or help me in any way in life to excel and become capable of amazing things. In order to achieve the highest level of excellence that I can in my life, I need to only build myself up and work hard to achieve everything that I want. It's really that easy and that simple. What's not simple and easy is cutting those people out and getting rid of them. It's hard to say goodbye to friends and sometimes family who you thought would be in your life forever, but sometimes it's the best thing to do. Eventually you get over them and you find other people or activities to fill that void. I have had to do this many times, and in my opinion the best thing to do is not fill the void with a person, but with getting to know yourself and developing habits that will get you to where you need to be in life. The people who are suppose to be in your life come in when you least expect it and when you least want it. To fill the void with another person could be a huge mistake because you could end up using them, and that's never a good thing. I don't like to hurt people and I don't like to be mean, but sometimes you have to make painful decisions in order to better yourself and your life. You cannot expect change unless you make that change with yourself first. The only way that your life can improve is if you make the change. That's what I am going to work on this week. Making the changes that I want to see in my own life. The changes that will make my life better. I'm already dreading the effort, but I know it will be worth it.


PS - Did I mention I really miss Spencer??? At least I have a good distraction this week. But still... Boo to separation!

Manti & Taylorsville Days!!!

Friday night Spencer and I had planned on going down to Manti.... Well about 7 minutes after we were suppose to leave, everyone who was going with us bailed. One of my many pet peeves, and ranks near the top, right above making sure the toilet paper rolls over the top and not the bottom. So both of us were pretty upset, but decided that we wanted to go anyway. So to make the trip a little more exciting we drove to my parents house and forced Ryan to go with us. Pretty sure Ryan enjoyed himself and the irreverent comments that I made throughout the pageant. Okay, so I have the brain of a 13 year old. Basically I say the first thing that comes to my mind, and it's not always something that should be heard by everyone else. Since Ryan is 12, my thoughts fit in perfectly with his.
About 20 minutes from Manti we were passing through this little town when I looked to the right and saw... The Illusion Academy. I recently finished the entire series of Arrested Development (highly recommend it) and so this reminded me of Gob, and his magical illusions. So of course I convinced Spencer to turn the car around so that we could take a picture. Awesome. So I had never been to Manti, and to be quite honest... what a boring drive... but what a gorgeous temple! Seriously stunning! The pageant was fun, probably not something I would go to every year, but now I can say that I've done it... It's really time for them to revamp the whole thing though. I would be willing to lend them plenty of amazing ideas to do so. Then on Saturday we headed over to Taylorsville Days, mainly to see the fireworks because they last for 30 minutes and were amazing! We chilled with 4 of my cheerleaders and their little boys and it was fun.I do not know why we are all leaning so far forward in that picture... weird. Minus the guy with the laser pointer sitting behind us. I love love love spending time with these girls! The age difference doesn't matter to me and I think that they are awesome and funny and I have a good time when I am with them. Thanks girls for hanging out with your old coach for the fireworks! You rock! And thanks Spencer for an AMAZING weekend! I love spending time with you! You're kind of my favorite right now!

Stunning????

Okay so I know I'm posting a lot of random stuff and pictures and I know you're bored of it and super annoyed.... well if that's the case then don't read my blog right? Problem solved. Next week I will be gone at cheer camp (Go Grizzles) for 4 days and won't be able to post so I gotta get it out of my system so that I can somehow survive my week with 600 screaming, sometimes annoying, energetic, drama queens, high maintenance, high school cheerleaders. Pray for me!

Last night we went to my friend Shelly's wedding reception (congrats!) and it was beautiful! I love that it was outdoors and I loved the house and the yard where it took place. Plus Shelly and Jake looked so happy and so good together! It's been a long time coming! Anyway Spencer and I spent most of our time taking pictures (surprised?) But look how cute we are together? Stunning! Haha! I also stole a picture from Kim's blog because I thought it was super cute! Have I stated recently how cute my niece is? Yeah I'm pretty sure I love her! Anyway enjoy our awesome pictures and expect more tomorrow because tonight we're hitting up the Manti Pageant... ROAD TRIP!!! Happy Friday!!!

Allie did you know????

Dear Allie,

Did you know that yesterday while you were cutting my Mom's hair that this happened? Don't worry I hung it back up and no one will ever know.... But I rocked that teapot. Just saying.

Love - Jenn

PS - I think you are amazing and so talented and unbelievable! Sometimes I wish I was you. Thank you for being so awesome and in my life!


And random picture of yogurtland.... Like I said.... OBSESSED!


Quick thought though. I have been thinking about this a lot lately in many different aspects of my life... When is enough enough? I consider myself a nice person. I try to treat everyone with respect (unless they've done me wrong) and I do my best to meet everyone's expectations. But sometimes people do not return the favor at all. Sometimes your friends treat you like crap in return and that can really wear you down. I haven't had the friend issue much lately because I have been so lucky to be surrounded by awesome roommates and an amazing boyfriend and my family who put up with me even when, during a game of Apples to Apples, I put down JFK when the word was Explosive (totally uncalled for I know). But I still have to deal with this issue. Cheer right now is tough because some of the girls don't seem to understand how important it is that they actually work and put effort into the sport. We are a competition team.... of course it takes effort. But when is enough enough? When do I just say, hey you're done and off the team? I will not let an entire team, my entire team, suffer because of one girls unwillingness to work hard. But I am not a mean person and just continually encourage them to do their best and practice, but I feel like being nice is a flaw sometimes, and I am struggling with it right now. Anyway Allie is amazing, Yogurtland is amazing, and I have a feeling that today will be amazing!

24 Hours in Rexburg...

Destination for the weekend was Rexburg, ID. Super exciting eh? Spencer had never been before and my parents had a few last things to finish up on the house, so we decided to tag along. I thought it was fun... than again I'm pretty easy to please. Highlights of the weekend included....

Frozen Yogurt! Oh how I have become obsessed... like I wasn't already obsessed before, but more so now. I need it at least once a week. That's right I said need. So we took the parents out for date night in Rexburg, and I'm almost positive they had ever done this before, but it was awesome. Who's looks best? My brother in law already picked mine so I'm already the winner. He has definitely picked my bowl twice in a row. Yes, I take frequent pictures of my fro-yo. Of course it wouldn't be a trip to Rexburg if my Dad wasn't recognized by some random student he had in his class like 3 years ago (probably exaggerating)... He's super cool with the students!

Campus. Because isn't that what all the cool kids do on Friday night? Spencer has never been there before so it was fun to show him around... Plus there's this building names after him. I may or may not have made him step on tulips to take this picture... my bad.

Painting! Yeah not much of a highlight but it definitely happened.

Driving the Lawn Mower 2 1/2 Miles to Storage. This was given to me as my job. I think my Dad was trying to punish me. I felt super white trash and super cool. I felt especially awesome when my parents drove up beside me, chugging down the Archer-Lyman Highway, and slowed way down so that Spencer and my Mom could take pictures and video of me fulfilling my chore. I had also forgotten my headphones, so I spent the 30 minutes of pure hickness singing to myself. I also realized that people think that it's okay to stare at you as long as they wave... no. It's still humiliating.

Road trip! sleeping in the car = probably one of my favorite things ever! Besides, you know, waking up with crazy pain in my neck and back... but that is why I am dating a massage therapist! Okay so that's not the only reason, but it's a great benefit. Plus we got lots of candy!!!!

Breakfast. So I don't usually eat breakfast and my Dad took us to this donut place, and since I don't eat donuts or breakfast I just hung out and used the wifi... nerd. Anyway my Mom ordered a hot chocolate and they give you the cup and you fill it up. Dad noticed that she wasn't drinking her hot chocolate and asked her why... well turns out that when she went to fill it up, since she wanted marshmallow flavoring in her hot chocolate she filled, on accident, the entire cup with only marshmallow flavoring thinking that it was hot chocolate with marshmallow in it. Apparently that doesn't taste so great. My Mom is so great!

Playing. Spencer was just so darn awesome at climbing the wall thing my Dad made in the back yard that I had to show my awesomeness too... Well I didn't even get halfway up. I blame it either on the shoes or genetics.

Temple! A 2 minute stop by the Rexburg Temple for a quick picture.



Random Pictures. While everyone else was working, I decided to take random pictures of myself in the bathroom. These are dedicated to my awesome father who told me that I only look good in pictures when I smile. Haha. I love him and his honesty. Speaking on random, who Idaho is this? Found it outside a gas station. Pretty sweet. Can we also talk about how Spencer loves to take pictures almost as much as I do? Match made in Heaven! I never have to beg him to take pictures which I love! We are so awesome together! And don't worry... in the thug picture those are definitely my manly fat fingers... not Spencer's. Sad.

Puppies! Spencer and I have a new obsession, and it is puppies! When we got back to Utah Saturday night we went to get dinner and right there was a man selling puppies! It was pretty much a sign! The one we played with could not keep her little puppy eyes open! She was so adorable! She was $400, and we have no place for a puppy, and isn't buying a pet together a huge thing? So for now we choose to just lust after them and think of names. We were talking about it in the car and I'm pretty sure my Dad thought we were talking about baby names. Haha! Dad, I would never name my child Winston! Puppy, yes. Child, no.